posted by Mom101 at 10:49 PM
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ON MY PERFECT CHILDREN
ON BLOGGING
ON TOYS THAT TALK AND FREAK YOU THE F OUT
NotBlogs
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31 Comments:
My daughter just turned 4, and I managed to convince her that 4-year-olds wipe their own butts. I am beyond ecstatic that she's bought into it. One down, baby!
I feel your pain. I am not sure if it ever changes though. I would love to not be out numbered by people who can't pick up after themselves!
I know! Not only am I outnumbered 3-1 by mess makers, they're all MALE.
I guess I'm lucky- with my husband and 2 kids, we have a 1:1 ratio of diaper-wearers to non-diaper-wearers.
Good luck with that...
@Two Beautiful Girls Mommy
Oh, but if they were all people maybe it wouldn't be so bad.
My four-year old cannot wipe his own butt yet. Or perhaps he can but he prefers my delicate touch. The eight-year-old has had diarhhea for three days and refuses to deal with the aftermath. I know there are bigger problems in the world but at the moment, all I want is to have a few hours where I am NOT asked to scrutinize someone's small butt.
Tell Nate to get self dispensing wet wipes. Those work really well.
But isn't it great to feel needed?
Um. No! WIPE, PEOPLE!!!
Lucas still gets help. He started going on his own. But then one day when I went into the bathroom, there was a small brown spot on the floor. Did someone drop poop on the floor? It was a 'chocolate' kiss imprinted by L's bum when he sat on the floor to put on his pants. Blurrrrgh.
What MU said. I'm really hoping that #3 is the dog, and not that Nate has broken both of his arms.
All you have to do is manage to live long enough until they move out. Then you'll only have to deal with your husband's aging complaints.
Sending a kid off to college is THE most rewarding day of a mom's life.
Sending the LAST kid off to college--that's the day you break out a bottle of Dom Perignon and live it up!
Please tell me one of the 3 is not Nate :)
mrs Q I am CRYING over here re: chocolate kiss - thanks for the laugh!
I so needed to giggle today!
If only my people would flush the damn toilet after they poop and not use the entire roll of toilet paper in one go!
LOL I'm so glad to be done with that!
I no longer hear the scream suddenly piercing the calm of the house "MOMMY! WIPE!"
I love my life. And I've got two more years before I'll send the oldest to the convent. Times are good.
I think that's the concussion talking.
Oh yeah, it is way too much to ask... at least for now.
I am so glad the girls are out of diapers.
You are channeling my husband with this post!
3:1 LOL!!!
Poor Nate.
Good luck with that!
3 to 1? Don't you have two kids? Who's the other butt you're wiping?
Well if you're going to set your expectations that high, you're bound to be disappointed! ;)
My Six Word Memoir on Motherhood was:
And the crap just kept coming.
Thankfully, with kids at 9 and 11, we are passed that. I hope we make it through their menses with more success.
No, not too much to ask, but we do find joy in the little things ...
For two years, I lived in an apartment which the four-year-old next door thought was his house. Apparently, he'd been close friends with the person who lived in that apartment before me. So this freaky-four-year-old would come over almost daily, use my bathroom, then scream, "WIPE MY BUTT!" Every time, I went to fetch his parents. Every time, I swore I'd lock my door.
All my friends thought this was a hilarious story.
Eventually I moved out. It was a gorgeous apartment, steps from the beach and semi-affordable, but the kid and his parents were far too irritating. Now I live a mile from the beach and pay way too much, but it's quiet.
Then I had a kid of my own. What was I thinking?
This very morning (as I wiped my baby's cute, dimpled, STANKY backyard) I actually calculated that I have spent the last 7.5 YEARS wiping asses.
I believe I have served my time. Just puttin' that out there.
'Tis a magical day when this phenomenon occurs, trust me. I swear I heard angels singing.
I agree the wiping issue is very taxing. Somehow -- perhaps I don't remember -- my older girls did not have a problem. My son on the oter hand is still not wiping properly. It's better since now at least he uses toilet paper, but still aggravating to have stained underwear. He's 5 and really needs to get a grip.
Have Chorizo and Pipi lost their luster or just missed the box? :P
Oh Sarah,
let's just say chronic diarrhea and parasites and did I mention the chronic diarrhea?
Seriously. Am done with all matters fecal.
I was outnumbered 4:1.
Now they bring me coffees and wine and help with the housework. (Well, sometimes, especially if I get operatic...)
I just had to wait till the oldest was 17 and the youngest was 12.
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