Guess What Day It Is! (Nope, Guess Again. Nope...Nope, That's Not it Either...)

In July I ordered some new bras.

(Yes, I know. Always a great sentence to start a blog post. Come one, come all, and read the very exciting post about that always high-interest category, brassieres!)

I ordered them from Fresh Pair, which, despite the double entendre of the name, intended or not, is a pretty decent site. (And no, freaky anti-capitalist conspiracy theorists, this is not surreptitious product placement in my blog.)

I have excellent taste in bras. When you are a 34DD, the boobies demand nothing less than perfection. And so, due to a backorder stemming from the wild popularity of the Wacoal French Garden Something-or-Other Contour Bra, my harnesses were delayed until August. Then late August. Then September.

Now October.

Which, on principle, compelled me to cancel the order altogether. I mean, October? By then the girls could be another size entirely. Stranger things have been known to happen.

I called customer service yesterday and was greeted with:
Hi and thank you for calling Fresh Pair. Founder of National Underwear Day.
National Underwear Day! Am I the only one who did not know of such a thing? That there is indeed a day--a federally sanctioned day--to recognize and honor our undergarments?

I know there are all sorts of weird national holidays. We list them on the Cool Mom Picks monthly newsletter as humorous excuses to shop. (A newsletter, by the way, that you all will enjoy to the degree that you will thank me profusely for suggesting you subscribe. Here, I'll make it easy: Click here.) Each month Kristen emails me this weird list of possible holidays and we laugh and narrow them to something like National Eat A Raw Onion Day and Rick Springfield's birthday. Because who does not want to shop in honor of Rick Springfield's birthday? Only crazy people, that's who.

This month alone there's Talk Like a Pirate Day (Sept 19), Elephant Appreciation Day (Sept 22), and Fish Amnesty Day (Sept 23) in which all fish are given...amnesty? So I should not have been surprised by National Underwear Day.

I'm sad that I missed it this year; it took place back on August 9th. And so I truly hope that next year we can all celebrate together.

Come to think of it, how does one celebrate National Underwear Day? Wearing our underwear outside our clothes, per the insane dictator in Bananas? Hoisting the skivvies up the flagpole?

Let's hear how you'd celebrate the day. It will give me some time to plan.


Blogger Her Bad Mother said...

I'd go with exposed underwear, but seeing as I did that for the first three months post-partum (nursing bra continually exposed, flaps down. Titillating to many a delivery person. 'Here's your package, Bad Mother! Nice tits!') it wouldn't really be special, would it?

I say that we each of us give at least one other person a wedgie today (while shrieking 'Happy Underwear Day!' of course...)

9/21/06, 11:40 AM  
Blogger V said...

I personally think this underwear day should be combined with Talk Like a Pirate Day. They just seem to go hand in hand....right? Maybe its just me....

I'm glad I finally got a chance to come on over...roo sent me! :)

9/21/06, 11:54 AM  
Anonymous wordgirl said...

I could find a pair of big ol' granny panties and then fasten them tight with a safety pin. Classy huh?

9/21/06, 11:56 AM  
Anonymous mothergoosemouse said...

Well, you could attend the Great Outdoor Underwear Festival in Piqua OH. I've never been, but my aunt and my cousin have. Of course, it's in October, and I'm not sure if they still have it. But heck, you could start your own!

Personally, I'm thinking a visit to the La Perla website is in order.

9/21/06, 12:10 PM  
Blogger MamaChristy said...

Funny because on Fish Amnesty Day my husband and I are going out to eat - without our child. Guessed what we are eating yet? Yup, sushi.

9/21/06, 12:11 PM  
Anonymous MetroDad said...

I think we should celebrate this hallowed holiday by NOT wearing any underwear ("going commando" as the kids like to say.) How better to appreciate the important role that underwear plays in our daily lives than by forgoing it for a day?

Unless, of course that would cause some sort of weird confusion if there happens to be a "No Underwear Day."

9/21/06, 12:44 PM  
Blogger ECR said...

I'd celebrate by having sex. Since that only happens in my house on holidays or when the moon is blue, it'd work out perfectly.

9/21/06, 1:05 PM  
Blogger Finelly said...

Oh yes ecr, sex is an excellent way to celebrate! In addition, I would burn all of my old undies and do some serious shopping for some new ones!
Oh yes, I do love to shop.

9/21/06, 2:04 PM  
Blogger J said...

So you're not getting the Wacoal? That's a crime. I love their bras. Maybe you can find them somewhere else?

(Great post, very funny, but I'm focused on the bra emergency...)

9/21/06, 2:33 PM  
Blogger Stephanie A. said...

Well, since it would be National Underwear Day I couldn't pick just one pair because each and every pair would need to be honored equally. I think I would have to wear every pair at the same time or make a change every half hour or so (yes, I have around 50 pairs of panties) so that each pair gets equal crotch time. Or maybe I could sew them together to make an entire outfit out of all of them a la Project Runway?

9/21/06, 2:42 PM  
Blogger Overwhelmed! said...

Rats, I missed Talk Like a Pirate Day! Arrggghhh!

Well, to celebrate National Underwear Day we could all take a picture of ourselves in our finest panties and post them on our blogs! What do you think of that idea? :)

Of course, I'd probably cheat and pull a picture off of Victoria Secret's website and post that instead. :)

9/21/06, 2:57 PM  
Blogger something blue said...

I think I would slip a pair of lacy underwear into my husband's lunch bag. That would go over swell.

I would also definitely have to possess the Power of Matching Underwear, preferably the lucky ones.

9/21/06, 4:28 PM  
Blogger Karen said...

I suppose that I would celebrate by giving mine a day of rest.

9/21/06, 5:05 PM  
Blogger T. said...

I do believe I would dye my husbands knickers pink.

And then I would giggle as he walked around in pink undies while muttering obscene curses about National Underpants Day.

But wait, is this just an American thing, or can us Canucks get in on the fun too?

9/21/06, 5:29 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Chicky said...

I think I'll give my underwear amnesty in honor of this special day. Like Metro Dad said, I think we should all go commando and give our poor underwear a break.

9/21/06, 5:47 PM  
Blogger Mazenbloo said...

I'm going to have to agree with MetroDad and Mrs. Chicky there. Commando day (and no, we're not talking of the movie where Ahhnuld rescues Alyssa Milano). Thanks for the links! Quit entertaining!

9/21/06, 8:25 PM  
Anonymous CrankMama said...

Brassieres? Thanks to you all I can think of in my mind, running like a bad 80s hit I can't get rid of

"tuxedo penis...tuxedo penis..tuxedo penis"


9/21/06, 8:37 PM  
Blogger Queso said...

Well...we cooouuld...get a handful of celebs (with at least 25 Qs) and have them each sign a pair of his or her underwear to be auctioned at a three-city simultaneous silent auction benefitting NOLA survivors. We'll do a massive media blitz, have Harry Connick on Ellen the week before to promote it (since his of course will be auctioned on ebay) and give each audience member a Fresh Pair GC. Then, the following week, we'll partner with Jenny Craig and have students at the Parson's School of Design create the 'world's largest' pair of underwear in Bryant Park. We'll have Kirstie Alley and Al Roker MC the unveiling event where tourists guess how many Kirstie Alleys or Al Rokers can now fit in the 'world's largest' pair of underwear. Oh and the event should be organized in a 24-hour period by an Apprentice finalist. All this should be followed by post-event photos, media follow-ups, funds raised pr and the like. Or something.

9/21/06, 9:12 PM  
Blogger Queso said...

Sorry. An extremely obnoxious PR person just took over my computer.

9/21/06, 9:14 PM  
Blogger starrynite said...

Okay, why is it called going commando?

Enquiring minds want to know :)

9/21/06, 9:18 PM  
Anonymous Paw said...

Skivvies? isn't that a minion undertaking menial labour or is it an across the pond expression. I hope you didn't mean skiddies 'cos that would be horrible.

9/21/06, 9:34 PM  
Blogger meno said...

I'm going to go the route of Madonna and my daughter at age two and wear my undies on the outside.

9/21/06, 10:33 PM  
Anonymous Momish said...

In honor of the special day, I think I would feel compelled to go to Victoria's Secret and adopt a few adorable items to add to our happy underwear family!

9/21/06, 10:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think I need new bras too. All the straps on mine are stretched out and fall off my shoulders.

ugh. More things to buy! :0

9/21/06, 11:07 PM  
Anonymous MJ said...

Okay, I'm just focused on the fact that someone else has the same bra size as me. My sympathies. And isn't dang hard to find a bra that fits at a price you can afford (that is, without selling an offspring)?

9/21/06, 11:39 PM  
Blogger PunditMom said...

NICE photo! DH needs to see that!

Keep those "girls" supported! Have you experienced the Susan G. Komen breast cancer benefit bra fitting at Nordstrom's? Now THAT'S an experience you won't soon forget!

9/21/06, 11:47 PM  
Blogger MrsFortune said...

Woah, I gotta get over to Nordstrom.

Anyway, I think we should celebrate that day by washing all of our underwear. Lord knows some of mine ... um ... well, let's not go there but washing would be good.

9/22/06, 12:54 AM  
Blogger IzzyMom said...

I would celebrate by tossing ALL my period underwear and then going shopping for a weeks worth of new black ones to replace them all.

Actually, I think I'll do that regardless...

9/22/06, 1:38 AM  
Blogger lara said...

i think i'd celebrate by giving all of my friends a beautiful pair of frilly pink panties. especially my guy friends. and i'd make sure to hide them somewhere where they'll find it at the most (in)opportune moment. because everyone likes surprise gifts, right? ;)

btw, thanks for visiting my place. :)

9/22/06, 2:56 AM  
Blogger Lisa Goldstein/Kelly Kelly said...

Hmmmmmmmm. How about launching a line of flesh colored t-shirts with bra decals ironed onto the appropriate spot. Same for shorts with like a thong decal. The shirt could say Happy Underwear Day.

Or put a clothes line from Cali to NYC and have Underwear Across America for publicity...and people could donate underwear to display with clothes pins all across the line. It might actually reflect a lot about each city/place where the underwear is from. Maybe red state underwear would be different than blue state etc... sounds like maybe the urban institute should look into this... and then release its results on National Underwear Day.

P.S. Thanks for the photo thrill. I think that's a pretty good way to celebrate the day right there. wink.


9/22/06, 8:28 AM  
Anonymous TB said...

I shall go commando. Except I do have to wear a bra. Stupid pregnancy hormones.

9/22/06, 10:31 AM  
Blogger Emma Kaufmann said...

I usually celebrate national underwear day by letting my husband go round the underwear department of Nordstroms and picking out loads of sexy bras for me, and then he gets the pleasure of paying for them!

9/22/06, 10:36 AM  
Blogger Tori said...

I'd wear my tartan knickers with pride and make sure that when I bent down - everyone got a little taste of Scotland!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

9/22/06, 11:56 AM  
Blogger Jess Riley said...

I actually put on a fresh pair to celebrate (mwa-MWA).

But is there a national Loud Muffler Appreciation day? Because my neighborhood has been celebrating that one for weeks. Who knows, maybe it's a movement.

9/22/06, 1:25 PM  
Blogger Mommy off the Record said...

I usually don't wear underwear so...hmmmmmm. OK, I'm joking. I DO wear underwear and pretty grandma-ish underwear to boot. So I guess I'd celebrate by chucking out all my Hanes Her Way undies and the going out to get some really fancy, sexy "panties". It's about time I did this anyway.

9/22/06, 3:09 PM  
Blogger Ruth Dynamite said...

Is this a new cause? "...because every human being deserves clean underwear, in case they have to go to the ER."

I like the idea of wearing underwear as outerwear, myself.

9/22/06, 3:11 PM  
Blogger gingajoy said...

a) 34DD = stacked
I can respect a lady who can fill a bra, unlike, uhm, me. But I myself use stealth technologies to provide the illusion, not of stackedness, but of any boobies at at all.

b) fish amnesty? i like it. about time, i say.

c) i take offense to this post which is clearly a capitalist conspiracy to force women into roles where boobies are what we're all about. and rick springfield. it's all a ploy to get free bras (or good customer service) and frankly, i am offended.

d) just in case (c) is true, i'm a 36 (cough) B, uh, A. I prefer dark colors as they don't gray in the wash. padding, and lots of it--a must.

9/23/06, 7:42 AM  
Anonymous Jessica said...

Just another Hallmark holiday. Underware has become so commercialized. Damn those corporate conspirators who force me to buy underware!

9/23/06, 8:59 AM  
Blogger crazymumma said...

Darn! I knew i had missed a special day.

On to Blondie. I will be buying the condo next to yours. I have been downloading lottsa old Blondie, Pretenders, Ramones lately.
Oh, and at her concert here in TO back in the *cough* early 80's, she just wore a bra with peg leg pants and stilletos. So she obviously knew about underpants day, even back then.
Lets all just try that outfit on now shall we?

9/23/06, 9:02 AM  
Blogger Karyn said...

Sweet Merciful Crap.

I would celebrate by STAYING IN. Nobody wants to see a Mom-Bra in 42D.

And I am not even going to discuss the underwear.

Suffice it to say that it is neither fun nor festive, although certainly scary.

I think everyone would appreciate it if I kept my porchlight out like a curmudgeon on Halloween and just kept the shades drawn. I'm skipping this baby.

9/23/06, 3:24 PM  
Blogger modmom said...

i was a 34DD when i was lactating,
now after the mastectomy i need 1/2 a 34C
next month is breast cancer awareness month, maybe you could have a "breast appreciation day" + celebrate all the great ...... somebody's yelling mommmmmmmmy

9/23/06, 5:22 PM  
Blogger urban-urchin said...

I'm afraid if I wore my panties outside of my clothes people would know I wear ugly panties. Boring black or white bikini briefs from Target. Not to mention I would look a bit like a stuffed sausage.

I also wear BORING bras. Black or white cotton with underwire which I even wear to bed because my boobies flopping around makes me uncomfy. As well as my `desire to postpone the tube sock boobie syndrome.

9/24/06, 2:24 PM  
Blogger movin'mom said...

Rachael Ray just said that today is National Family Dinner night tonight.

So what's for dinner?????

9/25/06, 12:49 PM  

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