9.15.2008

Thalia's first day of preschool

What if the kids aren't nice to her?
What if she's the littlest kid in the class?
What if she cries when she gets there?
What if she cries when its time to leave?
What if I cry when she gets there?
What if Nate and I don't fit in with all the other parents?
What if they find out I already turned down an offer to be co-class mom?
What if they find out that Thalia barely finishes a half a sandwich in a sitting?
What if they find out Thalia watches a shitload of TV?
What if they find out I have no problem saying "shitload"?
What if I am the mom who doesn't remember to send back medical forms and permission slips?
What if I am the mom who doesn't remember to buy her a backpack?
What if I am the mom who doesn't remember when school starts each day (because I'm already off to a good start in that department)?
What if they can't understand Thalia when she speaks?
What if the other kids have a party and invite everyone but Thalia?
What if we built up school too much and Thalia freaks out completely when she gets there?
What if all the other kids are in nicer clothes?
What if all the other kids are in jeans?
What if the director hates me?
What if someone different has to pick up Thalia every day because our schedules are so wonky?
What if Thalia doesn't want me to leave even though I'm back to work now and can't stay there with her every day?
What if Thalia has the best time of her life?
What if Thalia has the best time of her life and I feel guilty that I wasn't the one to introduce her to Duck Duck Goose and coloring your own masks and baking Zucchini Pie?
What if they find out I have a blog?


52 Comments:

Blogger Liz@thisfullhouse.com said...

Then, just blog and then fuhgettaboutit - works for me - good luck and happy belated birthday, by the way.

9/15/08, 10:41 AM  
Anonymous Jamie said...

I love this post -
It's really nice knowing I am not the only mom who feels this way.

9/15/08, 10:43 AM  
Blogger Desiree said...

Blog it out! Shake it off! And smile :D
Your little one is going to love school :D

9/15/08, 10:52 AM  
Anonymous Veep Veep said...

You will totally be fine.

Preschool is a breeze. It's fun that the kids get to go on their own for a few hours every day and its nice to see them after school and hear what they did.

Now, I can't help you with the mean moms you will definitely meet at the school but honestly who cares... they clearly still think they are in high school.

9/15/08, 10:55 AM  
OpenID cartoongoddess said...

Be ready for anything, but It'll all be okay. Really.

Hope Thalia is a little reporter like mine was and she dishes when she gets home.

9/15/08, 11:00 AM  
Blogger Summer Saldana said...

Oh you are a such a good mom! I am the mom who on the first day was dropping my child off and running for the door. ;-) Kinda like, see ya suckers!!!!

I am also the mom who forgot his decorated bucket on the first day....

Maybe I shouldn't go on. All in all, you are already winning! Be so proud!

Hugs...Summer

9/15/08, 11:18 AM  
Blogger daysgoby said...

She's going to love it - and you're...

you're going to be okay.

9/15/08, 11:19 AM  
Anonymous Jill in Atlanta said...

I feel better already. He tells me he loves school because I'm not there. I know in my heart that he loves me but likes to feel like a big boy. He's making tons of new friends. I haven't made friends there but I will. It will all be ok.

9/15/08, 11:20 AM  
Blogger RuthWells said...

I'd only really be concerned about the last one.... ; ) Everything else will work itself out.

9/15/08, 11:21 AM  
Blogger slouching mom said...

you both will do GREAT. promise.

9/15/08, 11:34 AM  
Blogger Lara said...

Ha! She'll love it - eventually! And just know your anxiety makes all of the rest of us feel better for feeling the same way. :)

9/15/08, 11:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am so glad I'm not alone! My daughter started kindergarten this year and not only did I forget open house and therefore had no school supply list but I think I was the only parent (besides my husband) who had no idea who their child's teacher was.

9/15/08, 11:37 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Zucchini Pie? Clearly we're at the wrong preschool. Cordy's cooking adventures are limited to spreading yellow frosting on graham crackers and adding dark M&Ms for wheels to make a bus.

She'll be fine, you'll be fine, and if anything out of the ordinary happens, well, you'll have no shortage of blog topics, right?

9/15/08, 11:54 AM  
Blogger Ali said...

i always have the pre school "what ifs" and freak out a little bit. and then everything is totally fine. i freak out for NOTHING.

although a mom in Emily's class did find my blog and said she spent 4 hours going through my archives. and my first thought was, "oh, shit, i hope i never wrote about her kid" hahaha!

9/15/08, 12:21 PM  
Blogger Lynette said...

I was the mom who practically threw a PARTY when I started taking the brat to kinder. She LOVED it!

9/15/08, 12:29 PM  
Blogger Cynthia Samuels said...

Well if you weren't thinking like that you wouldn't be mom! They all survive and so will you - and 95% of the time if there is crying it stops 45 seconds after you leave and then if it starts again it's 45 seconds after you show up to pick her up.
OH and if you need to sit there for a couple days, I'll bet you'll find a way to make up the time. Just tell them if they don't reschedule morning meetings for a couple of days you'll tell Sarah Palin!

9/15/08, 12:31 PM  
Anonymous Perfectly Disgraceful said...

Ack, you're making me feel bad about all the things I don't worry about. I figure if my kids are not visibly dirty and haven't forgotten their lunchboxes (which happens fairly often), then everything will be fine.

9/15/08, 12:46 PM  
Anonymous Sarah said...

And what if it all works out?

9/15/08, 12:50 PM  
Blogger mothergoosemouse said...

They will love her, and they will love you and Nate. I'm certain of it.

9/15/08, 1:03 PM  
Blogger Kat said...

This is LaLa's second year of preschool and she loves it. It is so great that she has made friends of her own and knows how to spell her name now. Now I am just worried about when we move and have to put her in a new school halfway through the year.

9/15/08, 1:04 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Chicken said...

Lady, trust me - you DO NOT want them to find the blog. My kid's entire preschool reads mine. Makes for some, er, awkward moments.

GAH.

Hope she has the best day EVER.

9/15/08, 1:07 PM  
Anonymous Astrogirl426 said...

Oh girl, I feel ya. First day of kindergarten was last week, and I had many of the same worries. It sounds like all those anxieties can be broken down into 3 categories:

1. Worries about Thalia doing well/being happy
2. Worries that people will think you're a fuck-up
Worries that you are a bad mom, and everyone will find out

Here's my thoughts on those three things.

1. From everything you've written about Thalia, she sounds like a happy, well-adjusted, well-loved kid. She'll do just fine (after all, it's preschool - the snotty behavior from other kids won't come till first grade, at the earliest :))
2. You will fuck up at some point (hell, I still owe the kid's preschool for lunches I didn't pay for), and the teachers are used to it and will figure it out. You will not be the only one forgetting to send in her sneakers on gym day, trust me)
3. All the other parents are either too frazzled, or too self-conscious themselves, to even think about whether you're a fuck-up. And if they do see you screw up, I can GUARANTEE you that the only thought in their heads will be, "Thank god I'm not the only one who forgot to send in that damn medical form!"

Good luck, sweetie :)

9/15/08, 1:11 PM  
Blogger Kimber said...

I'm sure she'll be fine. Both of my boys were criers, but that stopped after the first week.

9/15/08, 1:11 PM  
Blogger motherbumper said...

The only one I'd worry about is the last one.

9/15/08, 1:30 PM  
Blogger kittenpie said...

What if 95% of that doesn't matter, and you will take care of the other 5% because you can do it? It's never easy to start out some new step, but you and Thalia will rock it together.

9/15/08, 1:45 PM  
Blogger 9to5to9 said...

Between the two of my guys, guarantee you each and every one of those has happened.

Which reminds me ... where the hell did I put that medical form Big Guy's kindergarten has been nagging me about. The one the secretary looked down her nose at me over because it was returned to the school because I can't even remember to check my mail regularly.

9/15/08, 2:08 PM  
Blogger Jamie said...

The bad thing about being an adult - soooo many questions!!

9/15/08, 3:09 PM  
Blogger b said...

My worry about preschool: What if my kid is the mean girl?

Let's all get some ice cream (or liquor) and drown our preschool mom sorrows.

9/15/08, 4:08 PM  
Blogger Wicked Step Mom said...

I had my own personal moment of crisis just like this one. I am so glad I am not the only one!

9/15/08, 4:35 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Schmitty said...

Aren't we moms, crazy?! I bet everything went great.

9/15/08, 5:22 PM  
Blogger lisa {milkshake} said...

Ditto to all of that, just insert "Malayna" where "Thalia" is. We just got through day three of preschool. Now that I KNOW she's going to cry when I leave her, I can concentrate on another worry of mine - if she's going to make friends.

I'm glad to see someone else worries about this stuff! My girl was the only one crying the first day.

9/15/08, 6:38 PM  
Anonymous mrs. q. said...

The little man started two weeks ago. I was so freaked. He's never been in day care. In fact, he's never been alone with anyone other than immediate family. On his first day, I cleared the afternoon in case I needed to hang out for a while and make him feel comfortable.

He ran in and barely remembered to kiss me goodbye. Six minutes later, I left.

And I sat in the car and cried.

He's loved every day and can't wait to go back each time. I'm thrilled.

But did he have to not need me quite so much?

9/15/08, 9:36 PM  
Blogger Elaine A. said...

awesome post. that last line in the best...

9/15/08, 9:47 PM  
Blogger Wendy said...

I am that Mom and that is my kid. All the way. It's hard on the first day, isn't it? For me the second first day wasn't much easier! I still had all those feelings, and wasn't emotionally prepared for them!

Who introduced you to Duck Duck Goose and coloring your mask and zucchini pie (wtf?)? Even if it was your mom, I think for most of us it was school. She'll be fine and you will too!

9/15/08, 9:49 PM  
Blogger Lady M said...

"What if I didn't make friends with the other moms at the open house and now he won't get invited to play with anyone?"

I feel for ya.

9/16/08, 12:21 AM  
Blogger Jaelithe said...

I had the same feelings.

9/16/08, 1:43 AM  
Blogger Backpacking Dad said...

You will not forget to buy her a backpack.

Or I cannot be your friend anymore.

;}

9/16/08, 1:48 AM  
Blogger Two Beautiful Girls Mommy said...

I totally agree and understand. And unfortunately it gets worse when they get into kindergarten!

9/16/08, 3:00 AM  
Blogger Zeynep said...

- What if I send him to school without underwear?
- What if I forget to cook for his school picnic day and send him off with a pack of chips and carrots (only available carriable stuff at home at that time of the day)
- What if he goes to school wearing pants over his pajamas?

Oh wait - those all did happen, and the boys are totally fine. I, on the other hand, blogged about a few of these, and boy, when some of the moms found out about the pcinic day incident (I mean come on, I'm human!) they were really mean and kept going on and on about the wonderful stuff they baked for the event. I told them the chips were a hit and their carrot and spinach cakes sucked and none of the kids ate them. So there :P

9/16/08, 6:38 AM  
Anonymous The Yummy Mummy Cooks Gourmet said...

Wow. You are way more neurotic me. Which is sayin' something.

And by the way, I wasn't worried about any of these things. Until I read them here.

Now, I'm freaked... :)

Kim

9/16/08, 6:41 AM  
Blogger Gray Matter said...

I hate to break it to you, but you have just described every single first day I've ever had.

I'm not kidding. :-0

9/16/08, 11:32 AM  
Blogger PunditMom said...

Welcome to the first day of every school year from now on.

Breathe. It'll be OK. :)

9/16/08, 12:25 PM  
Blogger Mom said...

I liked this post - totally normal to feel this way but trust me you and Thalia will do fine, and you will hopefully be blogging funny stories about it soon!

9/16/08, 12:45 PM  
Blogger seph said...

i love this post too.

9/16/08, 12:54 PM  
Blogger nomotherearth said...

I always worry that the Boy won't get invited places because the moms don't like ME. I think I'm self-absorbed.

The Boy always does fine, and so will (did?) Thalia.

9/16/08, 2:38 PM  
Blogger Kristen Andrews said...

what a great post and as Mom's we do think all of those things. The last line is the best!

9/16/08, 4:03 PM  
Anonymous Alexis said...

I've been a pre-school mom for 5 years now, and I feel pretty confident about the kids ability to get along well, but I still freak out about the other moms.

9/16/08, 4:11 PM  
Blogger Elisa said...

oh, thank you. It's so nice to see that many question marks popping out of someone else's head, for once. I am not alone!

9/16/08, 4:28 PM  
Blogger Tracey said...

No advice. Just take a deep breath and wait and see...

9/16/08, 8:36 PM  
Blogger Sunny said...

take a deep breath.Allow your tummy to expand as you breathe in. Exhale.Repeat.

9/16/08, 9:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am only a new mom, 10 weeks in, and I love this post...i'm about to join my local mother's club and I'm wodering: what if someone makes fun of my little guy's baby acne? what if they decide his cradle cap, waxy ears and dirty nails (yes, his nails get dirty) make me a bad mother? what if they all of perfect hair and cute outfits and I'm hoping for a shower and will wear anything that doesn't have too much spit up on it? I guess I will be worrying forever....!

9/17/08, 9:30 PM  
Blogger jamey r said...

A few weeks ago my daughter started middle school. She stood in my doorway eyes wide and i asked her if she wanted me to go with her. As I launched myself off the bed to throw on a sweatshirt my husband grabbed the back of my pants and said more firmly than I have ever heard him say it, "NO". She and I sighed and said goodbyes. After she left I repeated almost everything on your list. Again. Just like I did her first day of preschool...It never gets easier. I think you cry more about it as they get older... the firsts get so final.
Nice blog!

9/26/08, 6:27 PM  

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