I Am Rarely Rendered This Speechless
Childless Forty-something Coworker: It will probably fall through.
Me: I hope so.
CFC: Otherwise, I want professional hair and makeup every day. Also I want to have our lawyers put in a clause that says they can only shoot me from the waist up.
Me: Good idea! Also a clause that the postpartum new mom has to be shot from behind a desk.
CFC: Wait...postpartum? How old is your baby?
Me: Almost nine months.
CFC: (Cackling) That's not postpartum! Please. It's like you'll have a two year old and be still using THAT excuse.